Most of us know the feeling of being in a new relationship – you talk on the phone for hours, think of them day and night, and sparks fly everywhere. It feels amazing. Eventually, the honeymoon phase ends, you might also find yourselves getting on each other's nerves or bickering over the slightest things. Minor disagreements or arguments are healthy while more frequent or intense bouts can become problematic and require further help. Therefore, seeking Black couples therapy and marriage counseling can be a great way to resolve conflict and reinvigorate your relationship.
What Causes Struggles in Relationships?
It is common to struggle in relationships, especially in romantic partnerships. However, some couples seem to fall into the same negative patterns, and the same challenges continuously reappear. So, why is that?
Let's look at two examples:
- Stress and anxiety cause a communication breakdown.
It is almost impossible not to feel anxious or stressed in today's hurried world. And though it is not a direct cause of a relationship breakdown, it does increase the likelihood of issues. For instance, if a partner has a demanding career, they may be more on edge or have less time to spend with their significant other.
When stress is not dealt with effectively, it may lead to frustration, anger, and resentment. And without proper communication, problems can increase. That said, the sooner the couple addresses the situation, the better.
- Partners don't speak respectfully to each other.
When a communication breakdown occurs, loving words can turn into criticism, speaking becomes shouting, and arguing leads to blaming. Yet, it never resolves the issue because significant others will become defensive, or harsh comments will fall on deaf ears.
A healthy partnership requires expressing emotions respectably, taking turns communicating, and sincerely listening to each other's perspectives, as no two are the same.
How Black Couples Counseling Helps
It can be intimidating when you don't know what to expect in couples counseling. But, essentially, a professional Black Couples Therapist will assess your situation and use black couples counseling treatment methods specific to your circumstances. You will work together as a team and construct a treatment plan that benefits you as a couple.
So, what types of therapy might your black couples therapist provide?
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a short-term therapy focusing on how our attachment styles influence our relationships and inadvertently interfere with forming healthy attachments with our partners. The counselor will observe the couple's relationship patterns and help them repair bonds and build trust.
EFT techniques increase the couple's awareness of unhelpful patterns and understand the problems contributing to their relationship. They will learn how to communicate their feelings more effectively and use language that isn't harmful to one another. EFT places high importance on active listening and accurate interpretation during conversations. The therapist will help them to open up emotionally and respond more appropriately while teaching methods that can be used throughout their relationship.
Gottman Therapy
The Gottman Method of couples therapy works to defocus couples off specific arguments and instead focuses on addressing issues more effectively, paying more attention to each other, and understanding one another better. It also highlights the impact negativity has on a relationship and provides skills to help partners resolve issues in a way that they can move forward together and prevent the partner’s from drifting apart.
This technique aims to eliminate criticism and other defense mechanisms to help solve repairable issues. It also encourages partners to positively influence one another, build admiration, and turn toward each other rather than avoid.
PREPARE/ENRICH
Prepare/Enrich is a relationship program that includes a heavily researched assessment tool for couples to take. Once the assessment questionnaire is completed, the couple meets with the therapist for several sessions to explore the strengths and growth areas of their relationship.
This technique addresses each person's feelings and goals in their relationship. Prepare/Enrich is often used in premarital counseling due to its emphasis on discussing roles and expectations as well as the historical influences of those requirements. It also explores opportunities to strengthen communication skills and an appreciation for each other's differences. These methods will help couples learn to manage life stressors and resolve conflict.
Improve Connection with Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling
Although it may be hard to see the light when your relationship is struggling, you are not alone. Even the most sound relationships can be challenging. Just remember that experiencing difficulties as a couple doesn't mean the relationship isn't salvageable. However, to make the relationship work, it takes a focused, intentional effort.
Your relationship can improve significantly through couples counseling and working together as a team. You will learn proper techniques and build a more trusting bond, a greater appreciation for each other, and more positive communication. So, please don't give up hope because, with the right tools, you can flourish together.
Start Repairing Your Relationship with Black Couples Counseling in Atlanta, GA
If your relationship is struggling Simplicity Psychotherapy can help with Black couples therapy. Our Black Couples Therapists will work with you to determine which type of therapy is best suited for the needs of you and your partner.
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- Reach out to speak with a Black Couples Therapist
- Schedule your first appointment for Black marriage counseling
- Work together to watch your relationship flourish
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Other Counseling Services we offer in Atlanta, GA
Besides couples therapy, we also offer relationship therapy to provide support for relationship problems. Additionally, we offer individual therapy for Black Women and Black Men. That includes counseling for depression, anxiety, and grief. All of our services are LGBTQIA-affirming and offered throughout Georgia with online therapy. We also have Counselor Interns who offer sliding-scale therapy.
About the Author
I’m Rayvéne Whatley a Licensed Professional Counselor in Georgia, Louisiana, and Texas. I enjoy empowering you to remove the mask of other people’s expectations and have the audacity to be yourself. I have a particular passion for Black man and women cope with anxiety and challenge expectations by reexamining beliefs that no longer suit their desires.
Note: While the information above is intended to provide insight as you begin your journey they are not intended to replace the guidance of a trained professional. Exploring these concerns in the presence of a licensed counselor or other licensed professional may provide deeper insight and assist in managing more multifaceted concerns that may arise.